Kids Want Grandparents

GRANDMOTHER’S DILEMA

It was six months ago that Pauline contacted me to tell me that she feared for her five year old granddaughter’s safety.

The story was very familiar to me. I’ve heard many similar ones over the years. The essence of this one was that this guy, in a previous relationship some years ago, had been investigated by the police and social services following allegations of child sexual abuse against his then partner’s little girl. The case was taken to Court and on the day, the child’s mother lied to cover up the abuse in an effort to ‘keep her man’! He walked free.

Now, he’s moved in with Pauline’s granddaughter. She’s tried to talk to her daughter about her concerns but has been told that she’s a ‘busy body’ and doesn’t know what she’s talking about.

During my initial investigation I spoke to the abused girl’s extended family. A maternal uncle confirmed the original alleged abuse, telling me that following the disclosure his niece moved to live with him and told him the full story. He was in no doubt that the abuse took place. He even confirmed that he knew his sister had lied but could do nothing about it at the time. He was still in touch with his, now twenty year old, niece but told me that she would not talk about her past to anyone. He was right: she would not engage with me or help in my investigation.

I felt I had enough evidence to get the police to look at the case again and contacted the local child protection team. A male officer contacted grandmother by telephone telling her that if she wanted to make a complaint then her granddaughter would be taken to the local hospital and have to be subjected to a physical examination of her ‘private parts’. Grandmother asked the officer to visit her at home so that she could talk about her concerns. The police officer refused to attend. The police did nothing more.

Originally grandma was enjoying weekly contact with her granddaughter. Now, contact has been stopped by her daughter and her partner. The child is desperate to see her grandma and is showing signs of genuine distress. Grandmother now wishes she had kept her concerns to herself. At least then she would be able to keep an eye on her granddaughter’s safety.

What I’ve put in place now is for grandmother to apply for a contact order through the court, thereby forcing a full investigation by way of a report!



CHILDREN’S CONTACT WITH GRANPARENTS
POSITIVE SAYS GOVERNMENT REPORT


Children who experience family breakdown have more positive outcomes when they can turn to grandparents for support according to the findings of a report commissioned by the Department for Children, Schools and Families.

The impact of Family Breakdown on Children’s Wellbeing Evidence Review stresses that the government fully support stable parental relationships but realise that many thousands of children are subject to the stresses of parental separation.

It comes as no surprise that the study’s findings show that there is a higher probability of children experiencing parental separation now than at any time in the history of families.